Endless Nightmare
by genieforyourworld
Summary: Because he was Sasuke, and sometimes happy endings didn’t have to be that important. /SasuSaku/


**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.**

**Also kudos to the songs _Decode _by Paramore and Taylor Swift's _Breathe _which both somewhat inspired this**

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_**endless**_** nightmare**

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_Because he was _Sasuke_, _

_she was _Sakura,

_and __**sometimes**_

happy endings 

_didn't have to be _that

_**important**__._

* * *

When she met him again, she didn't like what she saw.

_(but she still loved him) _

The man in front of her, was not her Sasuke-kun.

_(and what he could have been)_

It scared her and terrified her to an almost early grave, had Kakashi not snapped her out of her reverie. The older man told her not to look into his eyes and she knew that if she did, she would meet her end.

_(this tragically beautiful monster would not protect her)_

She saw the strikingly handsome pallid skin, the ends of his thick dark locks, the aristocratic cheekbones from the loss off that boyishly cute puppy fat, his thin lips not quite smiling but not quite frowning either.

_(but that was exactly it, _nothing_)_

Kakashi would kill her himself if she, like the fool she was, looked into what she knew was those red, red like _blood_, eyes. Those stupid freaking eyes that took her heart and capability to love away without even blinking.

_(what he had wanted to uphold the most, what he was most proud of, had completely destroyed him) _

She wanted to scream and beg and try and try and _try _to awaken the person that she desperately wanted to believe was still deep inside him. Beneath its black exterior, she wanted to believe that his heart still held some part of _him _- the boy she knew so long ago - frantically fighting and clinging to existence, begging _her _to save _him_.

_(like he had saved her so many times, so long ago) _

She never looked into his eyes that day. It would have been a disaster if she did. And she'd let everyone down _again_. Just like she'd let _him _down a very long time ago. The man in front of her was gone before long and she didn't even realize it. Too busy being caught up in daydreams and her own thoughts. Being selfish like always. It was a personality trait that she couldn't grow out of, _why couldn't they understand that_, written in the stars from day one.

_(much like their heartbreaking ending) _

Didn't she give her all saving lives, strangers and comrades, everyday of her life for the past how many years? Didn't she change, grow up, give up the life she had of sitting on the sidelines and just being the brainy, disciplinary supporter, being the yin to their yang? She was sure she did, so why wouldn't they just let her be selfish for once in her life when it came down to _him_?

_(because he wasn't her Sasuke-kun anymore)_

* * *

There was a time, on a mission, where Sai had been brutally wounded, he was dying, crying in agony in her arms, feeling true bloody pain for the first time. The situation was brokenly familiar as she healed him, willing him to try and stay conscious until they reached home. She spent the rest of the night by his bedside when he was stabilised. Though the aching in her heart was unlike, not as distraught, as when it had been with…

At least when it was Sai, he eventually regained himself, went back to normal.

_(_he _had remained broken, shattering slowly piece by piece)_

She had never been happier or so relieved to hear him call her those insulting nicknames.

When the boys at the hospital gave her those silly childish one-liners, she honestly didn't know whether to be flattered or punch them in the gut half of the time. Most preferably the latter.

_(they were things he never would have said, he would have had a bit more decency and respect than that, she guessed)_

Then there was the old men, the ones who had seen their share of war and battle, who sat in their wheelchairs and beds playing card games, boasting and arguing to each other who had the nicest nurse or doctor, trying it on with her, making her laugh, when she came to check up on them pretending to play hard to get to amuse them.

The time she went on that moonlit walk around town with Kiba during a power cut after he invited her out for dinner, he made her laugh the whole journey with his stupid jokes and tales.

_(if it were _him_, he wouldn't have need to say anything to get her to laugh or smile)_

Those days where Shikamaru would walk her home after they'd both leave the Hokage tower at approximately the same time (Ino informed her multiple times that her team mate _purposely waited _for her) and he'd tell her and vent all of his problems and complaints openly, as if she would make them all go away.

_(_he _would have taken it all like a man whether or not he was displeased or ecstatic, and let her tell him everything wrong with her life, and in _his own wa_y, help sort it out, because she had _always _been there when he did and didn't want her to be) _

She'd always smile - even when she really was not in the mood for it - for Lee when he brought her flowers and proclaimed his undying love for her. She tried not to encourage him in his over excruciating quests and challenges, but she learnt that that was close to impossible, so she made it worthwhile for a time to find him someone that deserved his gifts and attention.

_(her heart, even when split into countless pieces, was still - and always would be - _his_)_

She kissed Naruto once. They both wanted to see if things could be different, what would it be like.

It was awkward to say the least.

But there was nothing. No spark (just because her love was gone, doesn't mean she didn't believe in it). No fairytale ending watching the stars hand-in-hand. It was though she was kissing her brother, the one who would fight for his sister if someone insulted or upset her, the one who she had every excuse in the world to hate due to his annoying tendencies, but at the end of the day, she wouldn't replace with anything. He was the brother with (that _had_) the irresistible best friend, who he would have to warn not to lay a hand on her if he wanted to use his fingers ever again, but then gag and pretend to faint if he so happened to accidentally walk in on you both kissing.

_(but that boy, the one who _was _her brother's best friend, who all the guys _had _wanted to be, all the girls _had _wanted to be with, who crushed her heart so long ago, was virtually dead)_

* * *

He was no Romeo, no Prince Charming, he wasn't the knight in shining armour on the white horse.

She was no princess or maiden waiting for him to return, not anymore.

Sasuke was Sasuke.

Sakura was Sakura.

End of story.

* * *

The next time she saw _him _was who knows how many years later.

She doesn't remember the exact date or the exact time. Or even the name of the town.

_(the clock didn't strike midnight. Or one. Or two. Or three)_

Not like most girls would have.

Tenten remembered every little detail of the mission where she and Neji… well… you know…

Hinata recalled the surroundings and tiniest details of when Naruto first asked her out before she fainted.

Ino, knew the exact details, time, date, etc. of when and where Shikamaru first asked her to watch the clouds with him, their first 'real' date, the proposal. Her best friend even remembered the exact time she said her wedding vows, give or take two or three seconds.

But never mind them. They had their own silly love stories. And she didn't have hers. _Perfect_.

She had been travelling on her own for a while by then, wanting to just get out of that cramped village and see the world. Sometimes_, _she was unlucky as Tsunade when it came to gambling though, and she was somewhat too, a sore loser.

She was bleeding - a cut just above her left eye - the wound was quite deep but not threatening, nothing she couldn't fix with a few small stitches. She dealt with the pain easy enough.

Her face and hair (and the odd drop on the ground) were stained red. It was slowly starting to dry up on her skin now.

The few people on the streets stared at her for a moment, turning away when she'd glare back. There was one however, stubborn asshole, who refused to look away, causing her to walk straight into someone else.

On a ninja's instinct, she jumped back quickly, hurryingly apologising while covering her eye, still trying to stop the blood flow. As she went to continue on her way, a hand - cold and achingly familiar - reached out to the one covering her injury and pulled it down exposing the consequences of losing her temper.

Sakura looked up, into Sasuke's eyes, for the first time since…_when_…?

* * *

She shouldn't have been there, in that silly little room at the cheapest inn in town.

From the minute he'd dragged her out of the chilly night air, she should have kicked up a fuss and forced him to let her go.

Then run.

Run as fast as her legs would carry her.

But she was stupid. Again.

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. _

She didn't know what to think - her mind was _blank_ - as he set her down on the edge of the bed, knelt down in front of her, pinning her hair back with one hand and began cleaning her wound.

Their eyes were level, but he didn't look into those jade green orbs, concentrating - like always - on the task at hand.

She couldn't help but stare at his own pair - those deep black bottomless pools of onyx.

_(not red like blood)_

They were different than to what she remembered. There was something hazy about them. His sight was deteriorating slowly she realised, brain kicking into medical ninja mode.

But that wasn't just it. They were almost lifeless. Close to dead. But not quite, not just yet.

They made proper eye contact for the second time that evening.

He was frowning at her, even though the rest of his face was emotionless.

"You'll need to see a doctor."

It was her turn to frown back. "I can do it myself."

"The bleedings stopped for now, you can go find one in the morning." He was as stubborn as ever.

"Is there a mirror in the bathroom?"

"Yeah."

"Then I can fix it up myself," she stated, standing up while grabbing her bag and walking around him.

The bathroom itself was small and cramped, toilet, sink and shower. The basics.

Looking into the mirror, she sighed. Her hair was rumpled and messed, the small amount of make up she had put on hours ago was either gone or smeared.

Sasuke had cleaned up all the blood though, leaving her to cringe at the large gash above her eye.

She noticed him standing behind her through the mirror, leaning against the door frame studying her intensely. She tried to ignore him as best she could.

Sakura always had her medical supplies at hand, and set to work stitching up the cut.

Grimacing when she was done, it would do, she noticed that he was still staring at her.

She didn't want to look at him at that moment. She never thought of him much these days.

It was better that way.

_Or maybe that's just what she liked to think._

The less pain the better.

The sound of hissing water pouring out of the shower made her jump slightly, causing a small smirk to grace his face for a split second.

Sakura didn't no why she just stood there as he pulled his shirt of his head, letting in fall messily onto the floor. She should have walked out and left the man to his privacy.

Her gaze stayed dead ahead, inline with the base of his neck.

She could feel his hands graze lightly up along her arms, until one rested upon her neck, the other pulling the zip on the back of her dress down. He reached her shoulders and pushed it down off of her.

She let her eyes droop closed under his fingertips.

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**Part 1 of a two-shot I've been working on for a while. **

**Let me know what you think.**

**Review.**


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